Don't you just love it when you go through a day with whiplash from the past, present, and future? Just jerking back and forth with things from the past the effect the present which will effect something totally different of the future.

after my mom got out of surgery, she hugged me, told me she loved me and said I smelled good. I said it was the aquanet.

Calls all day..Every few moments, I would be intterupted by electric reggae beats by the most random person, the most random being a friend from junior high that I no longer talk to wanting to hang out and splatter her emotional bullshit all over me, as well as her herpes. no thanks, sweetheart.
One from an adorable boy, by "accident". I don't think accidents turn into half-hour chitchat sesssions...i don't know.

Things sometimes are so jaded....I'm so trapped in this one-sided world. Things are easy though, these days...
No more health problems.
No more questioning simple things.
Just my art. My shows. My friends. My music.

Tonite is a type of nite where it would be nice to just fall asleep on someone. I'm yearning for those less often cause I'm just maturing. The only company I prefer to take is the company of the void, ya know? The company of a real person is slightly frightening, all cause I know my emotions will stick all over their poor body, and when they rip off, it'll snap back at me and hurt. I don't want that anymore.

I'm so scared lately...
I don't know of what....
I guess it's just that I'm looking straight into the blind future. I have nothing really to hold me back.
I have no roots.
I'm just another faceless sap in this society that's just going to spend money and die.