Green Space Men: i like talking about future fantasies with you.......
must use inhaler: i do too...
Green Space Men: i want SO much to help give you hope for a better life ahead........a beautiful future for you, one of the brightest, funnest, sexiest grrls I know.......and yr quite driven at such a young age, and I admire that immensely.......
must use inhaler: gosh...youre so sweet...you saying that means SO much to me...really...

ahhhhh!!!! all this makes me sooooo happy!!!! i love talking to him..
hee.
too bad hes so far away....:(

this weekend was fun. really fun. saturday, c(XX), a(XX), L(XY) and i hung out ALL day. we went to goodwill. i got a sexy 50s sweater. best goodwill EVER!!!! i shot my slide film for photo. we went to walmart. me and carmen watched a knife presenation, asked if it could hack through bone. i didnt get a free gift cause im not 18. I DONT NEED NO FUCKING JUICER! godadmaodfihwo.....alene and lawson got lost. we called them from the service desk. "alene and lawson, your mothers are waiting for you at the service desk"
then, we went to az mills and walked around. went to the hat store. this one chomo guy at virgin was asking me all this crap like, "whats your name" and "where do you go to school" and i was like "i go to HIGH SCHOOL at NSA!!!!!!!!" then, we went to 5&diner and got shakes....mmmmmmmm!!! we sat and talked for HOURS! i had sooo much fun. i love those guys sooo much. me and carmen made fun of native americans...hahwooiiahhahahhayyayayaya...they just get a seizure and mumble....
hoobastankin in here?!!
jazz=imagination.....just made up!!!! ahahahah!!!
we then bumped on mill...
we all came outta our closet.
we love rap.
we all knew the words.
i felt like i belonged. :D
it was so great, cause we were all sexy.
me and my new hair. its cool when i brush it and wash it and stuff...
HYGENE RULES!!

i have school tomorrow. monday. an A day. i gotta go to the DMV first thing in the morning though...oh, how i abhore the dmv. i was supposed to go on saturday, but it was a 3hr wait...fuck dat.
today was just junk. i cleaned. bleecchh...
my mother and her bf are leaving on wednesday...awww yeah...its nice to have the house to myself. i dont like having a lot of people and such around. its just nice. i can relax. i think were gonna chill this weekend. its cool cause the kids are no longer sXe...now i dont feel as self concious....thank GOD!
goodnite people. have a great week.
-jo

schools back in session. and im getting sick (physically) can i hear a "fuck you"? (i love that song!!)
actually, today was good. i had two photos, and life drawing. life drawing is okay. i might switch out. i dunno. ill get to see naked people. yeah. fun.
yesterday was long and hard. a B day. anatomy, adv math, and fashion. fashion was AWESOME. im gonna be teachers pet! i know it. i must be. math and anatomy are going to be annoying. they want me to bring books every fuckin day. and ill have homework. every fuckin day.
the only thing i dont like about school is that it disrupts with the schedule I want. a late schedule. blaaah..thank god its now sat. today is the show. ill hang out with joe (maybe?) and itll all be good. i need to dance very well. i feel like attracting boys. maybe..?
im tired. and i want to be by myself. and sleep TONS. my throat hurts.
P(XY) was drunk when i last talked to him, and he really upset me. then, this morning, he sent me an email saying sorry, and that his ex whos visting family there was sleeping in the other room, and that he wished i was she.
hum.
personally, i thought that he was going to try to make the moves on her. i dont know. im not assuming anything, but im sure hes probably made out with a chick since hes been there at LEAST.psh.
i kinda miss having a boyfriend. someone to always cuddle with. to always hold hands with. to always be there for me. to talk to. etc. etc....*sigh*
its been two long years. one boyfriend. four hook ups. yeah. i want someone to be steady with. to lull myself to sleep in their chest. why isnt P(XY) here anymore? he was like that to me. its just painful to be fuckin alone again. cause thats how it feels it will always be.
well...i think im going to sleep...*sigh*
goodnite.
sweet dreams.
take care, world.
*mwah*

why is it guys only really dig me for a week? i guess im not interesting enough to have multiple thoughts about. im only valid for 35 thoughts.
then the digging of me goes away for them.
and they move on to someone who is a lot better...
fuck.
30 times.

my back is green.
and says "welcome" on it.
come on in and use me.